Individuals can typically confuse compatibility with similarity. They search for similarities in persona, way of life, political views, and different such components to find out whether or not they’re appropriate with a possible romantic associate.
However based on licensed marriage therapist Racine Henry, Ph.D., LMFT, having these areas in widespread would not assure compatibility—or concord, for that matter.
“Personally, I do not imagine a pair has to agree on something,” she just lately informed mbg. “These may be beginning factors for a bond or assist set up these preliminary emotions of curiosity, however when there’s rigidity or a scarcity of positivity, being from the identical hometown will not matter.”
There are instances when variations may cause tensions in a relationship—for instance, in the event you love spending your downtime as a pair whereas your associate usually likes lots of solo time, or in the event you love weekends in and so they love weekends out. These points may be labored by way of, however you may need a better time in relationships the place you had been naturally aligned in these areas. As nicely, having completely different political views or religions (as one other instance) really is a deal-breaker for some folks.
Nevertheless, in the event you’re merely in search of somebody who’s as just like you as attainable and utilizing that as a proxy for romantic compatibility, chances are you’ll be overlooking the components that really matter most on the subject of discovering a relationship that works long run.
